Comments on: Westminster Abbey

Westminster Abbey

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 17:58:09 -0800

How is abbey formed?
How is abbey formed?
How girl get regnant?

By: cavalier

cavalier — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:05:19 -0800

I'm really quite conflicted at the conflation of a brilliant something awful meme and the royal wedding. Not sure whether to congratulate you or give you a wedgie.

By: mhoye

mhoye — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:06:26 -0800

We shouldn't rule out the possibility of doing both.

By: ZenMasterThis

ZenMasterThis — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:07:54 -0800

I can has cheezburger? (Did I win?)

By: The Devil Tesla

The Devil Tesla — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:08:27 -0800

This is what Metafilter is all about.

By: MaryDellamorte

MaryDellamorte — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:08:57 -0800

The framing of this post is pure genius, that is all.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:10:00 -0800

"Then indeed the British people let themselves go in unrestrained jubilation." [BRITISH PEOPLE TRUDGING STOICALLY THROUGH TRAFFIC]

By: TwelveTwo

TwelveTwo — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:17:07 -0800

I have no idea how to form a response to this, but surely there is some way to pun on the fact that they need to do way instain mother>?

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:18:01 -0800

Fascinating stuff. I wonder which monarch started the slow-motion karate chop hello-wave?

By: Jehan

Jehan — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:18:50 -0800

What's wrong with that guy in the video? It sounds like he's narrating while straining on the bog.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:21:05 -0800

What's wrong with that guy in the video? It sounds like he's narrating while straining on the bog. He's just drunk on swan's blood and ermine sandwiches.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:27:59 -0800

The accent you are hearing on the video is what every BBC anchor sounded like until the 60s.

By: Jehan

Jehan — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:36:25 -0800

The accent you are hearing on the video is what every BBC anchor sounded like until the 60s. Wow.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:38:12 -0800

More coronation, including the oath (which features Pakistan, believe it or not)

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:39:43 -0800

skip to 6:20 for the oath

By: boo_radley

boo_radley — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 18:40:31 -0800

You beautiful bastard.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:05:00 -0800

fyi, your royal wedding guest name is Lord/Lady NameOfGrandparent FirstPetName Hyphen WordFromNameOfSchoolYouHaveAttended "of" StreetYouGrewUpOn e.g. Lord Harry Bunty-Banister of Milton if one of these words is your security answer on internet banking, do not attend the wedding

By: maryr

maryr — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:09:45 -0800

Lady Donald Bagheera-Technology of Rivendell. Excellent.

By: Jimbob

Jimbob — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:09:53 -0800

Lord Joseph Jacko-Pedare of Dillon Doesn't really work.

By: ninazer0

ninazer0 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:18:41 -0800

Lady Gladys Prancer-Ebenezer of Tizzana. I'm SO in with that one! I'll go fetch my ridiculous hat.

By: gilrain

gilrain — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:20:27 -0800

Lord Edmund Waldo-Idyllwild of Lodge I like it. Distinguished.

By: gc

gc — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:21:48 -0800

Ok, let's give this a shot. Lord Raymond Bailey-Whitfield of Andreas. Not bad. B-

By: Jehan

Jehan — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:21:51 -0800

Lord George George-Mary of Central Yeah, I think I'm going to skip the wedding.

By: Jehan

Jehan — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:25:27 -0800

My father would be Lord John Donkey-County of Happyland, which crosses over the boundary from awful into awesome.

By: Mayor Curley

Mayor Curley — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:29:02 -0800

EMRJKC94, I tip my hat to you. Well played. Now I am going back to praying for Oliver Cromwell to rise from the dead and turn the wedding into an 80's horror movie. Sort of like Jesus, but with an actual purpose.

By: Cat Pie Hurts

Cat Pie Hurts — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:32:17 -0800

Lord Abraham Hojo-Springs of 72nd Ave. That's the kind of name you get if you live in a cave under Central Park. You know, to avoid the brainbeams.

By: jb

jb — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:36:00 -0800

Lady Jean Kitty-Islington of Islington. (my family's so old they named the street after me. Or some bit o London).

By: contessa

contessa — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:36:36 -0800

In all seriousness, how are people supposed to see the wedding properly if all the guests are facing the aisle? WTF Anglicans??

By: Harpocrates

Harpocrates — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:37:00 -0800

Lord David Fish-Tecumseh of Hill We got a bit more then anticipated with the "Long to Reign Over Us" bit, that's a hell of a lot of waving over the years. I'll be a little disappointed when Queen Liz II kicks the bucked, it'll be interested to see who follows.

By: DrGirlfriend

DrGirlfriend — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:38:20 -0800

Lady Gloria Panchi-Parkville of Domenech And April 29th is my birthday so this simply could not be a better day for all of humanity.

By: barrett caulk

barrett caulk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 19:41:01 -0800

Lord Pearl Winston-Southwest of Terrace Enchanté! bows deeply

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:00:57 -0800

Lord Theresa Cat-Linwood of Darwin. I feel like a Discworld character all of a sudden.

By: etc.

etc. — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:04:38 -0800

My grandfather's name tears a hole in the fabric of the Peerage Name Generator space-time continuum: it's Earl.

By: Xoebe

Xoebe — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:04:55 -0800

Lord Bailey Rudolph-Del Rio of Meandering By Jove, I think I've got it! A disease, probably, considering the questionable sounding ancestry of the Rudolph-Del Rios.

By: Samizdata

Samizdata — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:06:18 -0800

Lord Walter Collie-Julian of Sunshine. I can mostly dig on that. Feeling a little Whelkish too, though.

By: Iridic

Iridic — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:07:01 -0800

Lord George Tooth-Westbrook of Kenilworth. [Dons frock coat and cravat.]

By: TwelveTwo

TwelveTwo — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:08:14 -0800

Lord John Johnny-Johnson of John. Oh dear.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:08:47 -0800

Lord Aphrodite Daisy-Central of Maple DAMN I'M A FUCKING FANCY BIRD, YEAHHHH

By: Malice

Malice — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:09:13 -0800

Lady Ollie Brownie-Gibson of Water Yeek.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:10:52 -0800

Lord Aphrodite Daisy-Central of Maple So my next pet and or drag name.

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:12:24 -0800

Lord Leo Chicken Friendly-Friends of Broome. As I suspected it's nonsense all the way down.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:16:16 -0800

Lady Hannah FatBun-Stuyvesant of Central Park West does not really have an acceptable ring to it.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:21:16 -0800

It does sound like you breed very smart, very small digs.

By: 1adam12

1adam12 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:22:00 -0800

Hmm. Lord Leon Frederick-Stuyvesant of Fahy. Hmmmm.

By: That's Numberwang!

That's Numberwang! — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:25:51 -0800

Lady Inez Jezebel-Fremont of Elm You can call me Jezzie.

By: LMGM

LMGM — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:27:50 -0800

Oooh, me! Lord Augusto Cholo-Central of Barclay I went to a boring high school. I sure am Latino, tho.

By: jeanmari

jeanmari — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:27:54 -0800

Lady Genevieve Patches-West of Edgewood. HALLLLLLLLO!

By: LMGM

LMGM — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:28:10 -0800

p.s. call me Cholo the Tyrant.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:28:53 -0800

You are Cholo central.

By: KingEdRa

KingEdRa — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:29:41 -0800

Lord Edward Popcorn-Leptondale of Strawridge. Yes. THE Popcorn-Leptondales.

By: LMGM

LMGM — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:30:28 -0800

I know. This is place is just lousy with cholos.

By: LMGM

LMGM — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:30:49 -0800

"lousy" is perhaps not the right adjective, mind you.

By: KingEdRa

KingEdRa — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:30:55 -0800

* I loved that doggie. RIP, Popcorn, AKA Zipperleg*

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:35:56 -0800

"Lord Aphrodite Daisy-Central of Maple So my next pet and or drag name." Please don't start using these for pet names. What will happen if you have a kid? That will be his (or her) first pet's name. That means when he or she grows up and has to come up with a royal invitation name, they'll be saddled with a monstrosity like this: Lord Gaspard Lord Aphrodite Daisy-Central of Maple-Jersey of Stormwood I suspect with a name like that, the royalty might even decide not to send an invitation to your son or daughter.

By: kdar

kdar — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:41:05 -0800

Thank you, East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94, for what is probably the best FPP meme/pun ever.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:42:04 -0800

My child could be a double Lord! All the better. I shall force them into study, to get a few doctors up in there. Yes, the kind of name you can't fill in the bubble for without a note from a notary and the state legislator. Very good.

By: not the fingers, not the fingers

not the fingers, not the fingers — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:43:25 -0800

Lord Sidney Occer-North of Bangalla. President Lamanda Luaga and The Phantom both send their regards, your majesty.

By: trip and a half

trip and a half — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:50:43 -0800

Lord Doctor Huckleberry-Hague of Ball. I think it suits.

By: enlarged to show texture

enlarged to show texture — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 20:53:06 -0800

I am Lady Minnie Cookie-Hunter of 215th. Growing up on a numbered street really ruins these kinds of games. But cookie-hunting is indeed an admirable pastime.

By: robotot

robotot — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:00:22 -0800

Lord Hans Marmalade-St. Pius X of Kitchener. Dear god, I sound like a madman.

By: stet

stet — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:10:09 -0800

Lord Jack Zach-Trucking of Oak. Oh my.

By: TwelveTwo

TwelveTwo — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:10:43 -0800

Lady Minnie Cookie-Hunter of the 215th. There you go! Now it sounds faintly militaristic, enlarged to show texture.

By: mkhall

mkhall — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:13:07 -0800

Lord Luther Shadow-Brush of Willow. My word. That sounds a bit ominous, doesn't it?

By: stet

stet — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:15:56 -0800

I could fiddle a bit and get Lord Hugh Simile-Information of McMillen. It's a good thing I respectfully declined my invitation to the royal wedding, I guess.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:18:03 -0800

If you have a numbered street then you drop the "of" and change it into a roman numeral

By: Philby

Philby — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:18:08 -0800

Lord Running Clam. That is all.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:18:39 -0800

although CCCXV is stretching it a bit

By: Tchad

Tchad — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:22:13 -0800

So I can be either: Lord Augustus Franklin-Oak of Colombia or Lord Bob Blackie-Hill of Baseline. That makes me laugh more than it should.

By: Lovecraft In Brooklyn

Lovecraft In Brooklyn — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:26:26 -0800

I'm Lord Jo Pikachu-Hill of Elm Street (note: can't remember what I named my Pikachu, so the species will have to do) not that good, really thinking of working on an FPP about The Crown banning a satirical program about the wedding

By: seawallrunner

seawallrunner — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:30:00 -0800

I am Lady Julija Aries-Marcelline of Atwater, from the British Columbian Colonies of Canada. [ flips hair, nods ] But you can call me Trixie.

By: mochapickle

mochapickle — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:39:27 -0800

Love it: Lady Betty Mae Pebbles-Palmer of Ravensworth (who breeds miniature ponies and has an endless selection of ostrich-feathered hats).

By: KingEdRa

KingEdRa — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:58:10 -0800

We should have a series of fancy/ridiculous dress meet-ups where we all attend as our noble selves. Preferbaly in the dirtiest crap-hole bars/pubs available.

By: Lovecraft In Brooklyn

Lovecraft In Brooklyn — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 21:59:34 -0800

We should have a series of fancy/ridiculous dress meet-ups where we all attend as our noble selves. Preferbaly in the dirtiest crap-hole bars/pubs available. I'd have to wear a Pikachu tail and a Freddy Krueger glove. No.

By: palomar

palomar — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:00:33 -0800

Lady Jean Popeye-Chinook of Fig. Good lord.

By: taz

taz — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:01:04 -0800

Lady Viola Seven-Vanguard of Esplanade here, available for dirtiest crap-hole meet-ups.

By: prettypretty

prettypretty — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:01:31 -0800

Lady Tauba Tweedle-MacRobertson of Newington How much fun is this?

By: palomar

palomar — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:03:22 -0800

I could also be Lady Mary Mama Cat-Terminal XXVII. Oh, heavens, that is just... yeah, wow.

By: Cat Pie Hurts

Cat Pie Hurts — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:05:28 -0800

Yeah, numbered streets suck. I updated mine with my paternal grandfather+current pet+current street: Lord Irving Squishy-Palm of Grant MUCH better.

By: ryoshu

ryoshu — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:13:36 -0800

Lord Lee Charmin-Bridgeway of Beaverton. Is this a royal wedding guest thing or a porn star thing?

By: KathrynT

KathrynT — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:15:14 -0800

I'm either Lady Helen Abigail-Nottingham of Thicket or Lady Barbara Abigail-St. John of Oldlands, depending on how far we're willing to stretch "street you grew up on." Not bad. My daughter, though? My daughter is Lady Margaret Thor-Earth of 94th Place. Bit of a mouthful, that.

By: KathrynT

KathrynT — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:20:14 -0800

OR Lady Mary Ash-Whole of 94th Place. That becomes truly unfortunate.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:21:16 -0800

Christ, what an Ash-Whole

By: nasreddin

nasreddin — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:30:05 -0800

Lord Victor Timofei-Stoddert of Godless. Not bad. (I actually did grow up on a street called Godless Lane. It was renamed from, roughly, "Vicar Lane" after the revolution.)

By: clavdivs

clavdivs — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:33:53 -0800

Emperor.

By: Mayor Curley

Mayor Curley — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:34:18 -0800

"Lord William Smith-Brunswick of Brunswick" Believe it or not, this is just one or two notches more pretentious than my given name.

By: ZeusHumms

ZeusHumms — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:45:48 -0800

Lord Maury Dino-Hill-Murray of B Hmmmmm.

By: ZeusHumms

ZeusHumms — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:46:36 -0800

What if East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 is your grandparent?

By: wachhundfisch

wachhundfisch — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:47:14 -0800

Lord Bartholomäus Silberfischchen-Gesundheitswissenschaften of Tiergartenstraße German is such a wonderful language!

By: iamabot

iamabot — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:49:31 -0800

Lord Jack Pokey-Assumption of Roadrunner

By: device55

device55 — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:52:04 -0800

Lord Archie Jack-Bain of Idlefield at your service. Scone?

By: polymath

polymath — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 22:56:18 -0800

Lady Bette Shep-Sexton of Jenna alternatively: Lady BJ Bear-Mountain of Thunderhead but that sounds way more porn name...

By: maxwelton

maxwelton — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:14:10 -0800

Lord Nicholaas Tosca-Capitol of Tamoshan

By: h00py

h00py — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:23:58 -0800

Lady Stirling Sukey-Bremer of Fischer. I kinda like it.

By: flabdablet

flabdablet — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:26:02 -0800

Lord Alec Smiggles-Camberwell of Wattle Valley wishes to remind other guests that using one's first pet's name as a Gmail password reset question might result in one missing one's missives, what?

By: h00py

h00py — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:26:06 -0800

Oops, that should be Lady Mavis Sukey-Bremer of Fischer. Hmm, Stirling or Mavis. I like both. Decisions, decisions!

By: baueri

baueri — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:30:10 -0800

Lord Niilo Vili-Aalto of Rakennusmestarinkatu doesn't sound very royal.

By: alasdair

alasdair — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:30:53 -0800

Lord Bartholomäus Silberfischchen-Gesundheitswissenschaften of Tiergartenstraße Oh, but you use "Windsor" now, don't you?

By: ArkhanJG

ArkhanJG — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:44:30 -0800

Lord George Basset-Poole of Boscombe. But then I am British, doncha know. More tea, Vicar?

By: Joakim Ziegler

Joakim Ziegler — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:02:40 -0800

alasdair: "Lord Bartholomäus Silberfischchen-Gesundheitswissenschaften of Tiergartenstraße Oh, but you use "Windsor" now, don't you" Lord Bartholomew Silverfish-Healthsciences of Animalgarden.

By: katillathehun

katillathehun — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:12:59 -0800

Lady Betty Chewy-Goddard of Yellowstone. Look, we're highly respected.

By: yiftach

yiftach — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:13:33 -0800

Lord Binyamin Chatul-Oaks of Etiwanda EPIC

By: Bibliogeek

Bibliogeek — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:20:00 -0800

Lady Lee Baron-Lundy of Pengra Wearer of fancy sparklies and purveyor of the finest trout in all the land.

By: Harald74

Harald74 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:20:04 -0800

With me not being English/American and all, I end up with: Lord Hugo Goya-Granly of Pedersgate How does it sound to you natives?

By: buzzkillington

buzzkillington — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:27:29 -0800

Lady Virginia Caesar-Vanderbilt of Little Dry Run. That street name always effs me up. I should use my current street, which makes it Lady Virginia Caesar-Vanderbilt of Genesee. Much better.

By: Major Tom

Major Tom — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:33:36 -0800

They wouldn't let any of you through the door. Sorry.

By: The Light Fantastic

The Light Fantastic — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 00:53:35 -0800

I've just realize that I will never, ever, understand the monarchy.

By: jack_mo

jack_mo — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 01:13:08 -0800

Lord John Fudge-Saviour of Noctorum. I only just noticed that Noctorum is a strange and spooky word. Thanks, Viking invaders! And thanks EMRJKC94, for distracting me from the 'herd the fucking lot of them into a basement and open fire' sentiments usually inspired by Royal wedding coverage.

By: tzikeh

tzikeh — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 01:17:53 -0800

Lady Elizabeth Kevin-Columbia of Harding. Eh. I could also be Lady Barbara Kevin-School of Cobane. (The pisser of it is that my mom named the puppy "Kevin" without checking under the hood. Fuck you, mom, for screwing up my royal wedding guest name!)

By: rhizome

rhizome — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 01:30:03 -0800

Lord Wesley Pepper-Wells of Flagstone It just comes naturally, I dunno.

By: Coaticass

Coaticass — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 01:53:09 -0800

Lady Sarah Tycho-MacKinnon of Glen Eira.

By: talitha_kumi

talitha_kumi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 02:32:59 -0800

Lady Margaret Pansy-Wood of Leggatts. I can live with that.

By: ruelle

ruelle — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 03:54:12 -0800

Lady Maria Diana-Saint Croix, of Century Park <3

By: jonnyploy

jonnyploy — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 04:01:02 -0800

Lord Cyril Billy-Burydale of Oakwell

By: AzraelBrown

AzraelBrown — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 04:22:03 -0800

I suggest an alteration of the rules: if you had a number for the street, change the "of" to "the", thus I'd get to be: Lord Gladys Riley-Mann the 3rd (where does it say to match the grandparent's gender? I like Gladys...)

By: Ahab

Ahab — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 04:29:03 -0800

Lord Teddy Widdles-Wood of Eric.

By: garnetgirl

garnetgirl — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:06:43 -0800

Lady Adele King-Fairfax of Essex. Sweet!

By: Phire

Phire — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:13:39 -0800

Lady Kelin Tico-Larsen of Pineglade. Sounds vaguely... ~~pulp fantasy~~ heretical. Curse my poor taste in pet names and/or my grandparents' ethnic names.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:15:34 -0800

Pineglade, heir to a vast air freshener fortune.

By: Mcable

Mcable — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:17:39 -0800

Lord John Marky-Rogers of Ky SR 715. Doesn't really work, does it?

By: Phire

Phire — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:17:54 -0800

Just in case no one's posted this here yet, my favourite 'souvenir' from the Royal Wedding fiasco: Kate Middleton For The Win.

By: Pallas Athena

Pallas Athena — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:18:15 -0800

Lady Robert Richard-Cathedral of Newark. We breed curates like there's no tomorrow.

By: harperpitt

harperpitt — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:18:46 -0800

My name is Abbey! To answer your question, I was formed in Youngstown, Ohio back in 1984. I don't have a firm memory of the event, but I believe my mother found me under a cabbage leaf. As a gay lady, I will get pragnent through some means of artificial insemination--though I am not opposed to adopting. Hope this helps!

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:21:45 -0800

Richard-Cathedral Dick Cathedral is a gay pulp noir character aching to be born.

By: shiu mai baby

shiu mai baby — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:26:06 -0800

Ooh! Lady Pearle Inga-Lineweaver of Greenlee. Pardon me for a moment whilst I don flowy robes and dust off my indeterminate Scandinavian accent.

By: kinnakeet

kinnakeet — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:31:25 -0800

Lady Amelie Butterball-Beaumont of Craine, at your service. I say, this really is frightfully fun, what?

By: Myeral

Myeral — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:39:29 -0800

Lord Henry-Patch Woodside of Hawthorn Grove. I shall be taking dinner at the Club this evening as usual, my dear.

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:41:22 -0800

Lord Francis Wilbur-Hopkins of Malthouse. Can I get a what what?

By: Pallas Athena

Pallas Athena — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:47:11 -0800

Dick Cathedral is a gay pulp noir character aching to be born. "It was a dark and stormy night when Cathedral strode across the rainy city to clue Lady Butterball-Beaumont in that the jig was up. At the sight of him standing in the doorway, tall, unmerciful, Amelie's face creased with the advent of womanly tears. "Dick," she murmured bashfully. "Surely... there must be some way to circumvent this unpleasantness? Tell me that isn't a gun in your pocket! For God's own love, tell me you're just happy to see me!" "No dice, old thing. Patch-Woodside confessed all to Wilbur-Hopkins and myself. Moreover, I don't exactly dance at your end of the ballroom, what what?"

By: Phalene

Phalene — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:47:37 -0800

Lady Ruth Monsea-McGill of Orange. Oooooooo! Posh! And she probably looks vaguely like the Bostonian who married into the family back when there was a trend for American heiresses to attach themselves to titles. Someone from Boston and like some guy shaped like a cello whose claim to fame was coming over with James I and having a portrait painted with a goat, in a purple velvet jacket, and achieving relative power for his talent for finding anything said by the monarch funny. I actually find myself strangely interested in the royal wedding. Must be a common wealth thing.

By: Eideteker

Eideteker — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:48:02 -0800

Lord Nathaniel Nothing-Wilder of Player hooray for never owning a pet!

By: litlnemo

litlnemo — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:48:41 -0800

Choosing the nearest named street to the numbered street I grew up on, and changing the first pet to current pet, I get: Lady Margaret Charles-Addams of Alton. Not bad.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:51:49 -0800

This is just more evidence that we need a massive multiplayer jeeves and wooster game like yesterday.

By: theredpen

theredpen — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 05:55:50 -0800

Lady Dorothy Nigel-Isle of Caswell I'm pretty sure this name will actually get me a wedding invitation today. [paints nails, waits at door]

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:00:35 -0800

The Isle of Nigel is very damp and cold but serves excellent crust-less sandwiches.

By: bengalsfan1

bengalsfan1 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:02:47 -0800

Lord Password Password of Password. (Oh shit...looks like I'll be changing stuff on the Internets all day!)

By: LD Feral

LD Feral — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:03:25 -0800

Viscount Michael Edward-Concordia of the 21st, UEL. Hmm, I think I've got my regimental tie somewhere... Also, you too can have a string of letters after your name, granted by the crown. As long as you were on the right side of that tussle in the Colonies, fwhat.

By: Decani

Decani — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:04:47 -0800

My lords, ladies and gentlemen, please provide a moment's respectful silence for... Lord Jack Timmy-Queen of Queen Mary Easily the most rugged and rogersome of the Lord's names so far, I think you'll agree.

By: deadwax

deadwax — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:08:06 -0800

Lord Herbert Tiger-Greythorn of Sweyn Good lord.

By: SNWidget

SNWidget — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:12:32 -0800

Lord Joseph Shadow-Dartmouth of Oaks I'm like some dark baron, face half covered by shadow, waiting to usurp the throne.

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:13:54 -0800

My kids get screwed: Allow me to introduce my son, Lord This-House-Is-Too-Small-For-A-Pet-Imai of Japanese-Streets-Don't-Have-Names

By: Chrischris

Chrischris — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:16:12 -0800

Lord Joseph Pookie-Holmes of Cherry regrets to inform Her Majesty he will not be attending, as his motor yacht was wrecked en-route from Goa, he losing his trunk of afternoon kit and being forced to eat his batman. He begs to present, however, this leopard-skin tea cozie as a token of respect and affection upon the occasion of the Prince's nuptial day.

By: Bugbread

Bugbread — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:29:06 -0800

Sorry, "Lord Thomas This-House-Is-Too-Small-For-A-Pet-Imai of Japanese-Streets-Don't-Have-Names". I don't want to give anyone the mistaken impression that my dad's first name is "This-House-Is-Too-Small-For-A-Pet".

By: marginaliana

marginaliana — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:30:35 -0800

Lady Margaret Cinderella-Peas of Mozelle. I take half and half in my tea, thank you. Enjoying the fuck out of this thread.

By: contessa

contessa — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:32:02 -0800

Lady Rose Tiger-Cross of Calgary.

By: fancyoats

fancyoats — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:37:49 -0800

Lady Constance Killer-Walker of Magnolia, how do you do?

By: mippy

mippy — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:41:11 -0800

I don't know my grandparents' names. However, I do get a day off tomorrow so I WIN. (Also The Body Shop gave me a cupcake and I didn't even purchase their wares.)

By: She Kisses Wyverns

She Kisses Wyverns — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:42:58 -0800

Lady Thelma Chesterton-Saints of Sandridge. Lovely to meet you all.

By: kinnakeet

kinnakeet — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:43:39 -0800

This thread is jam-packed full of win. Everyone, there's a gathering at the Fudge-Saviours'. BYOB.

By: epersonae

epersonae — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:44:50 -0800

Lady Helen Lucky-Eliot of Marigold ::curtseys::

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:50:42 -0800

Lady Rose Tiger-Cross of Calgary. ...head of the Assassin guild.

By: Spatch

Spatch — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 06:58:48 -0800

Lord Richard Boo Boo-Shutesbury of Main rah rah rah! we're going to smash the oiks!

By: dhens

dhens — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:00:42 -0800

Westminster Abbey -- Gorgeous, but it cost me £13 to get in with a student discount (which the attendant did not want to give me, as my student card didn't have an "end" date on it -- my end date is whenever I finish my dissertation) as opposed to the regular £16 fee.

By: ricochet biscuit

ricochet biscuit — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:03:45 -0800

fyi, your royal wedding guest name is Lord/Lady NameOfGrandparent FirstPetName Hyphen WordFromNameOfSchoolYouHaveAttended "of" StreetYouGrewUpOn Lord John Chaucer-Cunningham of Wentworth. Excellent. Of course, going for the least evocative possibilities, this renders me as Lord Earle Winky-Delta of Discovery, who I think stood as the Silly Party candidate in Chipping Barnet in the most recent UK general election.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:07:17 -0800

I'm not sure I want to see Earl's winky delta of discover.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:07:24 -0800

By: ricochet biscuit

ricochet biscuit — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:10:46 -0800

y not?

By: LoraxGuy

LoraxGuy — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:25:46 -0800

Lord David Bear-Goodsell of Droitwich ...Raises head from contemplative pose, absently strokes mustache and greying beard... Perfect.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:27:28 -0800

Lord Arthur Simon-Stewart of Melville. YES. Could've just as easily been Lord Louis Thurber-Moore County of Stirrup.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:28:30 -0800

Lord Arthur Simon-Stewart of Melville. Just realized, er, realised that the initials spell ASS. Which makes it even awesomer.

By: stuck on an island

stuck on an island — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:32:53 -0800

Lady Phyllis Cufflinks-Nightengale of Nightengale. I live on brandy and blancmange, wear a fascinator even in the bath, inspect my home nightly for infestations of Communists and haven't changed out of my wedding dress since I was jilted at the altar in 1954. Scotch egg?

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:34:50 -0800

My school was Windsor, and my street Prince Charles Boulevard... so I guess I can't really play this game :(

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:39:24 -0800

Scotch egg? But of cawse. Up for some croquet and taxing the peasants later?

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:49:09 -0800

We should have a series of fancy/ridiculous dress meet-ups where we all attend as our noble selves. Preferbaly in the dirtiest crap-hole bars/pubs available. This, a thousand bloody times.

By: Shike

Shike — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:53:08 -0800

Lord Newriders of the Purple Sage. Keeper of the orb, sceptre, sword and spurs.

By: functionequalsform

functionequalsform — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 07:59:13 -0800

Lady Josephine St. Helen-Alliance of Rosewood. TOP THAT.

By: desjardins

desjardins — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:04:42 -0800

Lady Rose Brandy-Longfellow of Mayflower Not bad.

By: functionequalsform

functionequalsform — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:06:02 -0800

German is such a wonderful language! Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern -schplenden -schlitter -crasscrenbon -fried -digger -dingle -dangle -dongle -dungle -burstein -von -knacker - thrasher -apple -banger -horowitz -ticolensic -grander -knotty -spelltinkle -grandlich -grumblemeyer -spelterwasser - kurstlich -himbleeisen -bahnwagen -gutenabend -bitte -ein -nürnburger -bratwustle -gerspurten -mitz -weimache - auuber -hundsfut -gumberaber -shönendanker-kalbsfleisch -mittler -aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:06:38 -0800

Lady Josephine St. Helen-Alliance of Rosewood. This is the exact middle point between "Aristocrat" and "Stripper"

By: troika

troika — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:25:00 -0800

Lady Virginia Snickers-Orchard of Brookwood I would like an orchard of Snickers.

By: emeiji

emeiji — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:29:02 -0800

Lady Bertha Fatso-St.Vincent of Forestwood.

By: MessageInABottle

MessageInABottle — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:31:08 -0800

This is just more evidence that we need a massive multiplayer jeeves and wooster game like yesterday. posted by The Whelk at 1:51 PM on April 28 This.

By: qxntpqbbbqxl

qxntpqbbbqxl — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:32:11 -0800

Lord Edwin Chirp-Preparatory of Interlaken

By: odinsdream

odinsdream — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:33:25 -0800

OMG Maggie Gyllenhaal is a time traveler and/or immortal!

By: redfisch

redfisch — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 09:47:36 -0800

Lady Marie Hercules-Elms of Mayfair Bite Me.

By: Mei's lost sandal

Mei's lost sandal — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 09:48:24 -0800

Hello. Lord Oscar Bilbo-Evergreen of Belvedere. So pleased you could come.

By: Pickman's Next Top Model

Pickman's Next Top Model — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 09:49:35 -0800

Lord Harvey BowWow-Rutgers of Juniper. I sound like a disgruntled pug.

By: Lucien Dark

Lucien Dark — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:02:39 -0800

Lord William Wussy-Rougemont of Holland. Ah Wussy, you were a good cat but you keep ruining games like this for me :-(

By: sideshow

sideshow — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:18:09 -0800

Lord Peter Sable-Cougar of Drycliff Heh, guess my crest would have some cats on it.

By: Hartham's Hugging Robots

Hartham's Hugging Robots — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:22:27 -0800

Lord John Atticus-Churchdown of Mandeville. I think my seat's in the front row somewhere... awesome post

By: thivaia

thivaia — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:34:23 -0800

Lady Gloria Belle-Hollins of Westwood.

By: OverlappingElvis

OverlappingElvis — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:34:32 -0800

Lord William Soleil-Tabor of Laddington. Hey, pretty good.

By: cereselle

cereselle — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:37:21 -0800

Lady Geneva Copper-Forest of Arlington. You may kiss the hand.

By: EmpressCallipygos

EmpressCallipygos — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:47:27 -0800

Alright, fine: Lady Sara Zach-York of Oakwood. Distantly related to Lord Revilo Casey-Windham of Oakwood.

By: slmorri

slmorri — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 10:56:55 -0800

Lady Margaret Ginger-Churchville of Whittier. I think I could actually fool somebody with this one.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:43:00 -0800

Lord Edward Oedipus-Thomas A'Beckett of Heatherstone. Fuck yeah.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:43:55 -0800

"I hear that Lord Edward of Heatherstone is one bad..." "Shut your mouth!"

By: PeterMcDermott

PeterMcDermott — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:45:09 -0800

Pretty sure I've told this one here before, but I'll take any opportunity to retell it again, thanks. Couple of years ago, I was invited to lunch at the Lords Dining Room. There are a range of dining facilities at the House of Lords, most of which has a low ratio of peers to plebs, but the Lords Dining Room is the one where all the bastards actually feed themselves. As usual, I fucked the whole thing up. There was a local train strike, so despite being up in plenty of time, I couldn't get a taxi to Lime Street. I missed the train that I should have been on, and wound up being 45 minutes late. Rather than going in with my colleagues and the peer that had invited us, the peer had to leave the lunch and come down to get me. As we met, I saw her raking me over with her eyes and realized -- I'd turned up for lunch at the oldest gentlemen's club in the universe, and I was dressed inappropriately. What the fuck made me think I could get in without a jacket and tie? Polo shirt and chinos just wasn't going to cut it. To cut a very long story very short, she despatched me with one of the ushers -- those cunts who look like they should be stood outside a cinema or a hotel -- to find appropriate attire, and the snidey little fuck managed to dredge up a yellow paisley tie that was outrageous even by 1970's standards, and an Old School blazer that was three sizes too short and three sizes too wide. By the time I made it to the lunch table, I was the only obviously homeless guy in the room. Michael Foot is at the table to the right of us, Norman Tebbit was at the table to the left. And I was at the table that wanted a hole to open up in the ground and swallow us up. As a little ice breaker, I thought I'd tell what I thought was a cute story about the previous time I'd been at the House of Lords. I'd been 12 or 13 at the time, and our local MP, the Right Honourable Eric Heffer had arranged us to visit as part of our British Constitution class. As the tour got into the second chamber, the guide told us how there were only two capital offences left on the statute books. The first was treason. The second was for someone who wasn't the leader of the House of Lords to plonk their fat arse on the Woolsack. On hearing this, I couldn't stop myself from hiding out behind the benches until our group had moved on, at which point I snook out and sat on that Woolsack for a good two minutes, rubbing my pubescent buttocks over every nook and cranny. Well, I thought it was a cute story. The peer who had invited me made a face like I'd just shat in the punchbowl. Obviously, they take this shit seriously. They wouldn't let you be one if you didn't take this shit seriously. Anyway, the highlight of the trip, for me, was after lunch, I went to relieve myself in the lavatories where our noble lords spread their ample behinds and pinch off a right honourable loaf. The pissoir was a pretty bog-standard urinal -- eight or ten stalls, all lined up next to each other, dividing the usual piss-trough. The one unique feature was the twelve inch high sheet of glass that ran the length of the piss-trough, the purpose of which I can only assume was to prevent the ermine from being splashed as Black Rod handled his White Rod (or as they handled each others rods while engaging in the sport of High Stakes Cottaging.)

By: mrgrimm

mrgrimm — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:45:19 -0800

I was wondering why the fuck this post had so many comments... Lady Hattie Marty Fish-Louisville of Wiedeman? Does not work. Rum & Monkey gave me: Margaret Butcher. I'll take it.

By: goofyfoot

goofyfoot — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:47:38 -0800

Lady Wilhelmina Greycloud-Rogers of Glenn. Which sounds almost plausible, so I am also Lady Jeri Raisin-John of 14th St.

By: spinifex23

spinifex23 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:53:27 -0800

I am apparently then Lady Elizabeth KITTY!!!!-Emerson of West 52nd St. Now where do I get my Official Royal Stationary printed at?

By: maryr

maryr — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:54:53 -0800

I like the idea of using my current pet and street. Lady Mildred Mildred-Essex of Boston. (My cat is named after my grandmother, who hated cats.)

By: spinifex23

spinifex23 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:55:52 -0800

Oh, and it's apparently South 52nd St. Oops. Thanks, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Thanks a whole lot. Your love of grids and numbers and logic ruined a perfectly good Internet meme.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:07:59 -0800

Elizabeth West-KITTY!!!!, 52nd Duchess of Emerson

By: PROD_TPSL

PROD_TPSL — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:12:10 -0800

Lord George Havoc-Fairfield of Oxford Keeper of the Peace, Defender of the Realm.

By: Ranucci

Ranucci — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:35:15 -0800

Lord Otis Midnight-Anderson of Home Farm

By: zippy

zippy — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:40:05 -0800

Lord Louis Simba-Huckleberry of Rural Route Six, represent!

By: rmless

rmless — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:55:46 -0800

Lady Larry Fluffy-South of Moffat, ready for tea sandwiches.

By: bashos_frog

bashos_frog — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 12:56:21 -0800

Lord Edward Oedipus-Francis of Saunders, at your service.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:18:28 -0800

Current pet and current address? Lord Arthur Simon-Stewart of Longfellow. :-)

By: justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow

justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:20:09 -0800

Lord Gillman PooPee-Grenville of Beaufort Genuine sounding? So close and yet so far.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:25:24 -0800

Lord Edward Oedipus-Thomas A'Beckett of Heatherstone. Lord Edward Oedipus-Francis of Saunders. Two houses. Both alike in naming pets, In fair Metafilter where we lay our scene.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:26:51 -0800

Ne'er shall we find the Heatherstones meet the Saunders in peace.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:28:25 -0800

What of noble PooPee?

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:29:42 -0800

I can't stop loling at this thread.

By: mandanza

mandanza — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:37:04 -0800

Lady Anne Shadow-Sandburg of Whitcomb. /curtsy It's a little non-traditional but I quite like Shadow-Sandburg.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:38:00 -0800

All right, now that we've got the naming schemes done, let's begin planning a meeting of the MetaPeerage.

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:51:41 -0800

I suppose we should compare crap-holes to see which is dirtiest

By: jedicus

jedicus — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:52:16 -0800

Lord Earl Leopold-King of Saddlebrooke. Sort of broke the naming scheme there, especially if you use the cat's full name. Then it's Lord Earl Leopold I of Belgium-King of Saddlebrooke.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:54:33 -0800

Sorry, East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94, I cawn't be bawthuh'd. I'll send my valet to do so.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 13:56:42 -0800

How do we arrange the peerage chart aside from putting me at the top?

By: mogget

mogget — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 14:15:31 -0800

Well, if we can use our current pets and street: Lady Helen Piper-Berkeley....of SATURN!

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 14:37:25 -0800

How do we arrange the peerage chart aside from putting me at the top? By party. All of the members of the Birthday Party on one side, members of the Surprise Party on the other. Members of the Lemon party will be asked to leave.

By: By The Grace of God

By The Grace of God — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 14:50:41 -0800

Lady Joyce Hamlet-Lincoln Framingham. hm, could work :)

By: quin

quin — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 15:23:02 -0800

Lord Grandpa Dog - University 50th St. I like it!

By: JoeXIII007

JoeXIII007 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 15:42:17 -0800

Lord Victor Spinner-Willow of Cedar Present!

By: JoeXIII007

JoeXIII007 — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 15:45:09 -0800

Additionally, just to be clear, I am not the only one who thought, on preview with no thread title, this was another thread about either reproduction or reproductive rights, right?

By: contessa

contessa — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 16:24:02 -0800

How do we arrange the peerage chart aside from putting me at the top? I know precisely where I go.

By: roobot

roobot — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 16:34:45 -0800

Lord Warren Doobie-Normal of Quetta. I hung out with the Beatles in India.

By: Errant

Errant — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 16:47:15 -0800

Lord Shantanu Eric-Williston of Clairmont. That "Shantanu" just gives it the touch of class the peerage has been missing, I think.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:12:42 -0800

How do we arrange the peerage chart aside from putting me at the top? Ahem. What did you just say, grasshopper?

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:31:46 -0800

I meant first among equals, of course. Let' us meet at Lord Doobie-Normal's country estate to take in the air and discuss the social organization.

By: Minus215Cee

Minus215Cee — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:36:29 -0800

Lord Senoelo Murphy-Heisenberg of Uranusweg. I guess, despite what I'd been thinking, it is my destiny to move to the Outer Planets and Rule the Solar System with a Titanium Fist. I shall be kind, but stern. Thirty years on, and I still miss Murphy. Best Dog EVER.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:38:35 -0800

well now we know who gets the Spice colony.

By: Inspector.Gadget

Inspector.Gadget — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:49:01 -0800

Lord Powers Turtle-Todd of Carleton. FTW.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 18:52:02 -0800

Powers Turtle-Todd sounds like a Ms. Marple villain written by Grant Morrison.

By: grubi

grubi — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 21:26:23 -0800

Let' us meet at Lord Doobie-Normal's country estate to take in the air Yeah. The air. Heh.

By: estuardo

estuardo — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 22:06:32 -0800

Lord Joseph Theodore-Alphonsus of Beaumont. Excellent!

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 22:48:46 -0800

Lord Joseph Theodore-Alphonsus of Beaumont. Is made of velvet and sighs.

By: You Can't Tip a Buick

You Can't Tip a Buick — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 22:53:01 -0800

Well, it's a hell of a thread. What do you call it?

By: patronuscharms

patronuscharms — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 22:57:02 -0800

Lady Geneva Maximillian-Heights Soulé What up, nerds, that's a legit monikker right there! Even if it does sound like the name of some obsequious apartment complex or something...

By: patronuscharms

patronuscharms — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 22:57:54 -0800

*of Soulé

By: JujuB

JujuB — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 23:02:37 -0800

Lady Wilhelmina Ashley-Adams of Valmont

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 23:05:58 -0800

Lady Wilhelmina Ashley-Adams of Valmont Owner of the largest collection of fainting couches in the western hemisphere.

By: Dr. Curare

Dr. Curare — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 23:06:17 -0800

Mine are all in Spanish, but a literal translation gives: Lord Joseph Dark-Jesuit of the Giralda.¹ I love it. I love the inquisitorial undertones. The Giralda is a minaret built in the 1100s in Seville, turned to a Cathedral bell tower in the mid 1200s. Damned Heretic Anglicans lost my invitation. ¹(Don José Bruno-Jesuita de Giralda)

By: taz

taz — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 23:11:31 -0800

That might be my favorite so far. God, these are wonderful.

By: Hoopo

Hoopo — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 02:13:57 -0800

Lord Norman Spotty-Knoxdale of Bourbon

By: deborah

deborah — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 03:27:29 -0800

Lady Rachel Foxy-Yorba of Diamond

By: Dojie

Dojie — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 05:57:49 -0800

Lady Helen Killer-Foster of 72nd. Not a fantastic royal name, but I'm all set if I ever take up roller derby.

By: COD

COD — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 06:49:04 -0800

Lord John Joesph Hoopie - Purdue of Kimball.

By: wenestvedt

wenestvedt — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 07:26:34 -0800

Lord Norman Buffy-Cretin of Summit. Uh, oh: sounds like another one of those jumped-up grocers as in "To the Manor Born"...

By: East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 08:37:37 -0800

But congratulations for rising above your humble beginnings at Cretin School!

By: grubi

grubi — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 08:41:40 -0800

How dare you? it was named for Baron Cretin!

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 08:47:57 -0800

Ah yes, Baron Cretin Von Stupid-Face. Many of these surnames come from the anicent Metafilterian tradition of allowing the in-laws to add a middle name to the son or daughter in law during the marriage to ensure that the old names survive, leading to such luminaries as Baron Rothchild Worthless-Cad Reading of Chartoon and Lady Alexandria Slut-Bucket Filroy of Filroy.

By: grubi

grubi — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 08:53:22 -0800

Not enough foreign "of" in here (e.g. de, du, von, van). signed, Lord Arthur Thurber-Stewart of/de/von Melville.

By: nickyskye

nickyskye — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 15:42:58 -0800

Lady Beatrice Peewee-Nightingale of Retreat. Or Lady Faith Peewee-Heavenly Rest of Fifth.

By: sonika

sonika — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 16:46:42 -0800

Lady Marianne Abigail-Hampshire of Houghton. And may I introduce you to my son: William Wensleydale of Westminster. And my maiden name? Buckingham. Yes, those Buckinghams. Bunch of jerks all in their "palace."

By: homunculus

homunculus — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 16:59:01 -0800

Lady Beatrice Peewee-Nightingale of Retreat. On the head of Princess Beatrice, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming.

By: polymath

polymath — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 18:19:42 -0800

Lady Constance Killer-Walker of Magnolia Lady Helen Killer-Foster of 72nd Make sure to seat the Killer-Fosters and the Killer-Walkers on opposite sides of the hall. The family schism runs deep, and if they are forced to spend time together things tend to get a bit, well, messy...

By: oneirodynia

oneirodynia — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 20:14:16 -0800

Lady Cornelia Cinder-Pinewood of Exmoor. I think I'll keep it.

By: TwelveTwo

TwelveTwo — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 23:08:59 -0800

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 You've endangered countless lives with your comment. There are those among us who have not only already played your little name generating game, but they also believe in reincarnation. You and I may wish to play the game again, but we both know we can't. But there are those who believe they can, and they'll be living their lives fast and reckless from here on out. They've got 30 days to live before the comments close, and that's enough time for them to get in their car and go. These people are on the roads now, East Manitoba. They are driving by schools and pedestrian orphanages. They know they can't off themselves the easy way; simple suicide is no way to get on to Metafilter with a new birth street, pet name, grandparent, and school. They need to die and get reborn to a well organized upper middle class family with a willingness to ruin their child's youth with strict plans devised before their birth. Such a cosmic punishment means murder of innocents. They only have a month, East Manitoba. One Month. Who knows what will they do now, but whatever they do, it all rests on your shoulders now. Sleep easy, antichrist.

By: e to the pi i

e to the pi i — Sat, 30 Apr 2011 00:56:00 -0800

Look, I know I'm crazy late, but I'd be Lady Muriel Duffy-Steeple of Sleepy Hollow, later to become Lady Muriel Duffy-Madison of Sleepy Hollow. Yes, it was a scandal. No, I do not wish to rehash it. Cucumber crustless sandwhich? Lurve it, ta. Of course, my son would be Lord Thomas Matilda-Joyful of (the) 79th. So that's... weird.

By: GatorDavid

GatorDavid — Sat, 30 Apr 2011 12:32:23 -0800

My first pet was named Woogie, but I only know of him through stories and not memories. The first pet I remember was unfortunately named Lady, which would make for a bit of gender-confusion in my MeFi-given royal moniker. The first pet that was truly mine was named Reebok, but that's just ridiculous. So I'll go with the nickname of my current pet. Official documentation refers to him as Sir Budrick the Lion-Hearted Mutt, but we just call him Buddie. So that gives me: Lord Vincent Buddie-Florida of Fatima Not bad.

By: exlotuseater

exlotuseater — Sat, 30 Apr 2011 23:46:28 -0800

Lord Walter Lily-Melville of Sedgewick

By: SLC Mom

SLC Mom — Sun, 01 May 2011 10:42:47 -0800

Lady Edna Renegade-Sullivan of Rincon Villa This is just a sly way to learn my first pet's name so you can have all my passwords, isn't it?

By: SMPA

SMPA — Sun, 01 May 2011 14:02:31 -0800

I spent way too much time deciding this. I had no pets with names so I had to borrow the first one that belonged to my sisters, thanks to divorce I didn't want to decide on which street I officially "grew up" on (especially since the leading candidate was Avenue 57,) and I went to a bunch of schools, then was homeschooled. So, as befits a royal wedding name, this came about only after lots of compromises, and yet, is relatively awesome, in an exhausting kind of way. Lady Agnes Fawkes-Stowers of Simsbury (and yes, my sister really did name her hermit crab Guy Fawkes.)

By: cmyk

cmyk — Sun, 01 May 2011 19:11:33 -0800

You shall properly address us as Lady Ellen Sam-St. John of San Pedro. I missed out on the chance to be royally redundant by growing up one street too far to the south. The next block north was San Juan. (For an extra-Victorian upper crust, I can pronounce it Sinjin.)

By: pseudonymph

pseudonymph — Tue, 03 May 2011 23:56:49 -0800

Lady Elva Biggles-Mangoplah of Caithness. Oh dear.